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At times, Jay Spring feels he is “the greatest person on planet Earth”. Having received an NPD diagnosis, his periods of extreme self-importance frequently escalate into “highly unrealistic”, he admits. You feel invincible and you tell yourself, ‘The world will recognize that I surpass everyone else … I’ll do great things for the world’.”

For Spring, these times of heightened ego are typically coming after a “sudden low”, where he feels overwhelmed and self-conscious about his behavior, making him particularly vulnerable to negative feedback from others. He began to think he might have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) after investigating his behaviors through digital sources – and was later confirmed by a specialist. Yet, he questions he would have accepted the diagnosis without having already reached that realization by himself. “If you try to tell somebody that they have the condition, {they’ll probably deny it|denial is a common response|they’re likely to reject it,” he says – especially if they experience beliefs of dominance. They operate in an altered state that they’ve built up. And within that framework, I am superior and {nobody can question me|no one should doubt me|my authority is absolute.”

Understanding The Condition

While people have been labelled as narcissists for more than a century, the meaning can be ambiguous what people refer to as the diagnosis. People frequently term everybody a narcissist,” states an expert in narcissism, noting the word is “applied too broadly” – but when it comes to a professional assessment, he suggests many people keep it private, as there is widespread prejudice associated with the condition. A narcissist will tend to have “an exaggerated self-image”, “difficulty understanding others’ feelings”, and “a tendency to exploit relationships to seek admiration through things like seeking admiration,” the specialist clarifies. Those with NPD may be “extremely narcissistic”, to the point that {“they’re not able to hold down stable relationships|“their jobs are damaged|“they have a distorted view of reality,” he states.

Emotional connections were never important about anyone really, so relationships weren’t a priority relationships seriously

Sex-Based Distinctions in The Disorder

While up to 75% of people identified as having NPD are males, findings suggests this figure does not mean there are fewer narcissistic women, but that narcissism in women is typically appears in the less obvious variety, which is often overlooked. Narcissistic traits in men tends to be more socially permissible, just kind of like everything in society,” explains a 23-year-old who shares content on her co-occurring conditions on digital platforms. It’s fairly common, the two disorders are comorbid.

Individual Challenges

I find it difficult with handling criticism and rejection,” she shares, whenever it’s suggested that the issue lies with me, I tend to switch to self-protection or I become unresponsive.” Even with this reaction – which is often called “ego wounding”, she has been attempting to address it and accept input from her close relationships, as she doesn’t want to slip into the harmful behaviour of her previous life. I used to be manipulative to my partners as a teenager,” she states. With professional help, she has been able to manage her condition better, and she explains she and her current boyfriend “operate with an understanding where we’ve agreed, ‘Should I make a harmful comment, if I say something manipulative, point it out {right then and there|immediately|in the moment’.”

She grew up mostly in the care of her father and says she lacked supportive figures in her youth. It’s been a process of understanding continuously what is suitable or harmful to say during a fight because I lacked that guidance as a kid,” she says. “Nothing was off-limits when my family members were insulting me when I was growing up.”

Root Causes of The Condition

Personality disorders tend to be linked to early life adversity. Genetics play a role,” says a consultant psychiatrist. But, when someone exhibits NPD characteristics, it is often “connected with that individual’s particular early environment”. Those traits were “a survival tactic in some ways to survive at a very early age”, he adds, when they may have been ignored, or only shown love that was based on meeting specific standards. They then “continue to use those identical strategies as adults”.

Like several of the those diagnosed, one individual thinks his parents “may be narcissists themselves”. The 38-year-old shares when he was a child, “everything was all about them and their work and their social life. So it was like, keep your distance.” When their attention turned to him, it came in the form of “intense expectations to achieve high marks and life achievements, he says, which made him feel that if he didn’t fulfill their expectations, he wasn’t “worthy.

As he grew older, none of his relationships lasted. “I’ve never cared about anyone really,” he states. “So I’ve never taken relationships seriously.” He didn’t think loving someone, until he met his present significant other of three years, who is also dealing with a personality disorder, so, in a comparable situation, struggles with mood stability. She is “very supportive of the thoughts that occur in my head”, he explains – it was in fact, her who first suspected he might have NPD.

Accessing Support

Following an appointment to his doctor, John was referred to a clinical psychologist for an assessment and was given the NPD label. He has been recommended for psychological counseling via government-funded care (a long period of therapy is the only treatment that has been demonstrated to benefit NPD patients, specialists note), but has been on the waiting list for a year and a half: “They said it is expected around in a few months.”

Disclosure was limited to a handful of people about his condition, because “prejudice is common that the disorder equates to toxicity”, but, in his own mind, he has accepted it. “It helps me to comprehend my actions, which is always a good thing,” he explains. All of the people have acknowledged their condition and are looking for support for it – leading them to be open to talk about it – which is probably not representative of all people with the condition. But the growth of individuals sharing their stories and the rise of digital groups point to {more narcissists|a growing number